Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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