I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
