i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
