I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
