I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
