Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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