we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Randomize