you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
