Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
