i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
