I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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