Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
