yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
should my penis look like a turkey
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize