you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
So much rum. So many feels.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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