Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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