Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize