HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
