so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
