...so i touched it.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
