Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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