His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
