i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I want to be your penis for a week.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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