She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
