You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
