I showed him my bush... on skype.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
