Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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