Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize