Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
The power of my boobs compel you
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
