I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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