Three words: puerto rican gang bang
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I want to be your penis for a week.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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