508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
