He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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