normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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