I am puke
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
