"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
