No more Irish car bombs ever.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I have fence marks all over my body
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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