ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
My vagina just recognized that song.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
