3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
