He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
