5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize