Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
The best revenge is premature balding
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
