It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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