Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
