I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize