im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
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