And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
