Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Randomize
