We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
