is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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