Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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