It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I need to align my fucking chakras
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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